when i'm supposed to be writing this for me?
i sorta feel like...
idk, i want to write
not about any topic in particular,
i just...
i want to write about what i feel
but
its always been hard for me to put my feelings into words
and...
idk
it seems more difficult all of a sudden
i'm not sure why
is it normal to feel pressure and stress before anything happens?
anyways...
i'll include the poemy thingo i made up:
I know i can't change the past,
But is it possible for me to change the present,
Enough for me to change my future?
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I know that feeling. Just wait until something comes to you. Whether it takes a week, a month or only a few days, I'll still read it. Sometimes it feels like you should write, but you know that you designed your blog for you, so it's confusing. You don't have to feel obligated to write, and I say that as both a friend and a reader.
ReplyDeleteIts not just that i feel i should write for my readers (reader i should say :P ) although thats certainly a part of it.
ReplyDeletebut its also that i feel i should write for myself.
there are so many things running through my head, some personal some not, but i can barely understand them as it is, i dont understand them enough to write them down, and yet, i think that if i could write them down i would then understand them better.
idk,
i dont think that makes much sense.
but i think i 'should' write down what i'm feeling otherwise i'll stop altogether and won't start blogging again at all.
but, idk
i just completly lost my train of thought.
i tend to keep things to myself, to hold feelings and thoughts inside myself and not express them.
but i get the feeling thats actually bad for me, and so i try to express them, or some of them in some form or fashion here. because it was easy for me to do it for a while.
but now it's got hard, and now is when i need it the most because there is so much going on, and i'm not just talking about starting uni.
but...
idk
talking to actual people would probably be better
but... i never see anyone anymore
which is bad of me
*sigh*
idk, i have ...
idk